Gary Faulkner is an ex-con, unemployed handyman, and modern-day Don Quixote who receives a vision from God commanding him to apprehend Osama Bin Laden. Gary travels to Pakistan to complete his mission, armed only with a single sword obtained from a home-shopping network. Gary meets old friends from Colorado, new friends from Pakistan, enemies from the CIA, and even God and Osama himself while on his quest.